Miserable at Best
by maispecialk
Summary: A possible 3 shot inspired by Clary and Simon's brief relationship in CoA from 3 different POV'S. What if Jace had known about it? What if he had seen it instead of being thrown in jail by the Inquisitor? Rated T for make out scene 3x over.


**Mortal Instruments belongs to Cassandra Clare. Not me**.

*Jace's POV*

I don't know how I ended up here. Not really. I mean, I just walked, letting my feet lead me until I stopped. Of course, I was outside her window. She was staying at Luke's now, without any other real place to go. Of course there was always Simon but from what I could hear, it sounded like he came to her instead of the other way around. I wasn't spying. I was checking to make sure that she was home. Without knocking on the front door. By looking in her window. I saw them, heading into her bedroom . Simon was following her with a couple of DVD's in his hand.

"It's really the timeless showdown of all anime. Bleach or Naruto?" He offered, holding up the two cases he had brought with him. I saw Clary sit on the bed and pick at the comforter. She was biting her nails, a sure sign that she was thinking. She looked up.

"Neither."

"I hate to tell you Clary, but you lost all your DVD's when your house was attacked and these are the only two I brought with me." Simon explained.

God, he was absolutely clueless. Thank the Angel. Clary wasn't giving up though.

"I don't want to watch a DVD." Clary said, looking at Simon. How could he not know what that look meant?! What kind of idiot is he?! This was killing me to watch, for more than one reason. The fact that Clary was looking at him like that, so desperately, it made me want to go in there and kiss her with everything I had.

Then there was the guilt. It wrecked me. I knew I couldn't change the way I feel, no matter how hard I was trying. A small part of me knew that Clary was feeling the same way, which is why she was acting this way with him. It was how she wanted to act with me.

I saw Simon sit on the bed. I wanted to be the one sitting on her bed. I wanted to be with her right now, instead of him. "Are you okay? Do you want to talk?" he asked, providing the 'supportive best friend that's in love with you' role. The same role he'd been playing for the past 10 years. "Simon, right now the last thing that I want to do is talk." Why did she have to sound like that? So…ugh! I bet the idiot won't even notice.

"Do you want to go out to a movie? Go get something to eat? I know something's bothering you. I just want to make it better." Yep, the idiot didn't notice.

"Simon, you're my best friend. You know that right?" He nodded, looking stupid, like he didn't know where she was going to go with that. "Everything I knew about my life just changed in the course of a week. My mom is a Shadowhunter. My dad is an evil, murdering psychopath. We fought vampires and demons for God's sake Simon." He stared at the comforter with no response. "But you're still here." She finished. It was Simon's turn to look at her like she was stupid. "Of course I'm still here. Where else would I be? You know how I feel about you." He said, wrapping his arm around her shoulders. "That's the thing, Simon. As much as everything's changed in the past week…I want more." She whispered. The stupid mundane stared at her, hardly believing that his dream was coming true. "You're the one thing that hasn't changed in the past week. But I want you too. I want to forget everything that's happened over the past week. Do you think you could…make me forget, that is?" She asked.

Her voice held a new sense of desperation that I'd never heard before. Simon leaned in lightly and kissed her on the lips. I felt my heart crack. I knew I should turn around and start walking back to the Institute, but I couldn't. I watched as she threw her leg over, straddling him. At that point my heart had shattered into a million different pieces. I could cry. I knew I could, but I wouldn't. I refused to. She was my sister. This would happen eventually. I should just walk away and leave everything behind me. I knew I would come back to her and try to push the scene before me to the back of my mind. But I knew I would fail. And she would hear the hurt in my voice and her face would fall in disappointment. I knew I had to go. I had to move on. I'd survive. But I'd be miserable.


End file.
